I am still on my How I Met Your Mother kick.  Admittedly, I paused watching it to watch Psych, because one, there was supposed to be a new Psych movie released in December (it got pushed back) and two, my Hulu kept fucking up and the sound and video would be off. It was like watching a poorly dubbed Japanese anime.  Anyhoo, I just watched the episode where Lily challenges herself to make a list of 50 Reasons to Have Sex.  She writes it on a MacLarent’s Irish Pub napkin, which was featured on the CBS website while the show was still airing.  You can find the image of the napkin (below) still floating around the internet, but for shits and giggles, here’s the entire list of Reasons to Have Sex by Lily Aldrin.

1. Because you can’t get to sleep
2. Make-up sex
3. Break-up sex
4. Your friend told you about a new position
5. Revenge
6. Rebound
7. Para trooping/bangin’ for roof
8. Nothing good on TV
9. Because you’re in a hotel
10. Curiosity
11. It’s raining
12. It’s halftime
13. Diet / exercise
14. Celebrate recent weight loss
15. You finally get the chance to show your childhood bed some action
16. Prom night
17. You’re already at their place and don’t want to have to move your car
18. Show off new lingerie
19. Celebrate major victory by favorite team and/or political candidate
20. Your chance to do it in a specific location (ex. airplane, Burger King bathroom)
21. To prove we’re not in a rut
22. Stress relief
23. Just shaved legs
24. Forgot to buy a birthday present
25. “Let’s Get It On” by Marvin Gaye is playing on the radio
26. Celebrating the joy of life after a near-death experience
27. Your one chance with a celebrity
28. Time an egg
29. To avoid cleaning, studying or doing work of any kind
30. She wants to
31. It’s cold outside
32. Cheer someone up (pity)
33. Keeping up with the neighbors
34. Your roommate is out of town and you can do it on the couch
35. Some very protected sex to celebrate the fact that I’m not / we’re not / you’re not pregnant
36. Practice
37. They have air conditioning and you don’t
38. Because he/she is from one of the countries you haven’t had sex with a person from yet
39. “Damn, your calves look good in those cargo shorts” sex
40. Called/texted the wrong person but she was into it anyway
41. Because she looks like your superhot cousin and this is the closest it will ever get to it being okay
42. Breaking in a new apartment
43. Because he says he loves you and you’re not ready to say it back yet
44. Wingman diving on the friend grenade
45. Your condoms are about to expire
46. It’s getting a little hard
47. Miscommunication (Cheetos sex)
48. To reinforce good behavior (such as shaving and dental hygiene)
49. To change the subject
50. Love ♥

Image by Niek Verlaan from Pixabay